Tag: God’s love

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Your Heavenly Father Wants to Train You

We should pray for deliverance from suffering of any kind, and we should believe and expect that God will deliver us immediately. But until that deliverance comes, we should regard suffering as discipline and respond accordingly.

why suffering

My wife works for the Chicago Public School system as a substitute teacher. That means she is assigned to schools all around the city, in all kinds of neighborhoods, in grades from preschool to 8th. When she comes home at the end of the day, sometimes she tells stories of pleasant classrooms with delightful children. At other times, she returns home like a shell-shocked, mustard-gassed soldier from a losing battle.

In the battleground classrooms, she experiences the bitter fruits of children who have not been properly disciplined first at home and then again at school. If children come from broken families lacking wise discipline, even the best schools have a major challenge on their hands. But that situation is often compounded by some school administrations that do not back up teachers and—believe it or not—even prohibit teachers from handing out consequences. The result is children who have no respect for teachers and a classroom where little productive education happens even for the good kids.

If anyone understands firsthand what a good and loving thing it is to discipline children, it is my wife.

Why suffering?

The Bible says that God in love, like a good Father, disciplines us. He allows pain into our lives, not because he is malevolent but because he is good and knows what will benefit us most long-term. He follows his own advice to human fathers:

“Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him” (Proverbs 13:24 ESV).

Discipline is loving even though it does not feel like love.

Principles from Hebrews 12:5–11

We find the fullest description of this vital principle in Hebrews 12:5–11. Much could be said on this passage, but here I will simply quote each verse and follow with succinct principles.

“Have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? ‘My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him’” (Hebrews 12:5).

–Don’t regard discipline lightly; that is, don’t ignore it, don’t fail to examine your soul for sin, don’t regard suffering as something other than discipline—such as “bad luck” or “one of those things”—and as a result fail to repent of any known sin.

–Don’t let discipline—that is, painful circumstances in your life—make you weary to the point you give up and stop believing God’s promises.

“For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives” (Hebrews 12:6).

–Discipline feels like God is against you, as though he rejects you, but it actually is proof of his love and that he receives you.

–Discipline can be extremely painful. The Greek word mastigoō, translated “chastises” in verse 6, is the word for the scourging Jesus underwent before the cross (the King James, NKJV, and NASB use the word “scourges”; it literally meant whipping). So, “chastises” is rigorous, painful discipline.

“It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” (Hebrews 12:7)

–For discipline to fulfill its purpose, you must endure it and correct whatever needs correcting. If you give up by no longer trusting God and his words, if you fail to examine your soul and repent of sin, then the discipline will be wasted pain that does not fulfill its purpose.

–The NIV translates the first sentence in this verse, “Endure hardship as discipline.” Certainly we should pray for deliverance from suffering of any kind, and we should believe and expect that God will deliver us immediately. But until that deliverance comes, we should regard suffering as discipline and respond accordingly.

“If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live?” (Hebrews 12:8–9).

–We must renew an attitude of subjection to our Father.

–If we do, the discipline will bring us life.

–Discipline accomplishes its work in the dimension of the human spirit. God is the Father, the Creator, of our human spirit, and therefore he knows what brings it good.

“For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness” (Hebrews 12:10).

–The purpose of discipline is our good, as Romans 8:28 says, “In all things God works for the good of those who love him.”

–When we respond correctly to discipline, it brings holiness. Holiness is good.

“For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:11).

–Discipline is painful, unpleasant.

–Discipline trains us.

–Discipline yields peace.

–Discipline yields righteousness.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: We may regard pain as bad luck, as something God did not deliberately allow, or as something that simply overflows into one’s life because we live in a fallen world.

God’s way: Love seeks another person’s good even if it requires temporarily bringing them pain. Our heavenly Father knows that temporary pain saves us from eternal pain, that some pain saves us from far greater pain, that much good can come from some bad. In love he disciplines with long-term wisdom.

Life principle: When we suffer, we need to submit ourselves completely to God and his purposes and repent of any known sin.

Jeremiah 9:23–24: “Thus says the LORD: ‘Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the LORD.’” (ESV)

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Identity: Our Father Wants Us to Resemble Him

When your heavenly Father infused his identity into your human nature, it was an act of love.

God's image

I have four sons, and as a father who loves his sons mightily, I want them to have things in common with me. I gave my last name to all of them, my first name to one of the them, and my middle name to another. In each of them over the years, I have seen in different ways reflections of myself, and at those moments I have been pleased. For example, I competed in gymnastics, and each of my sons competed in gymnastics, and I enjoyed that they did. It is loving to want to have things in common.

It is also a loving thing to want to give gifts to another person. Giving yourself is the highest expression of loving. This loving, self-giving spirit explains the desire of parents to have children in their own image. Fathers and mothers want to give their very selves to their children in a unity greater than any other: the unity of identity. Parents want to give their name to their children. They want to give their strengths to their children, strengths like beautiful eyes, strong stature, intelligence. They want to look at their children and see something of their best selves.

God gives us this desire because this is his desire. This desire to pass on one’s identity, to have an enduring name, to have a lasting posterity in one’s children and children’s children, is also the result of a healthy, righteous self-respect. God has perfect self-respect. In love, he wants to pass his glory on to us. He wants to see his glory in us. This is love for others mixed with proper self-respect.

God’s image

Scripture reveals in many places God’s loving desire to share his identity with us:

“Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.’ So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them” (Genesis 1:26–27 ESV).

“We all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

“Those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers” (Romans 8:29).

“Put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:24).

You “have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator” (Colossians 3:10).

“You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48).

“You shall be holy, for I am holy” (1 Peter 1:16).

“Then I looked, and behold, on Mount Zion stood the Lamb, and with him 144,000 who had his name and his Father’s name written on their foreheads” (Revelation 14:1).

Our way and God’s way

Our way: Fallen humans don’t want to resemble their Father. They want to leave home and be their own person.

God’s way: He delights to see himself in us. When he infused his identity into human nature, it was an act of love.

Life principle: One of the priceless gifts God has lovingly given you is his identity. You bear the image of God in your human nature. Cherish and respect that gift. More than anything else that you are or that you accomplish, the image of God stamped on your nature gives you value and significance. It ensures God’s love for you.

Jeremiah 9:23–24: “Thus says the LORD: ‘Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the LORD.’” (ESV)

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Your Heavenly Father Rejoices over You

Knowing that God delights in you transforms life from mere duty to endless joy.

God's delight

Our son took his family to Disney World this week and has texted photos of his girls standing with Mickey Mouse, Goofy and others. The looks of delight on the girls’ faces are priceless. Parents and grandparents live to bring delight to their children.

What do you delight in? Roller coaster rides? Work? A hobby? Reading a particular genre of books? One stocker I visit with at the grocery store delights so much in superhero movies and comic books by Marvel and DC that he attends an annual convention they sponsor, and it’s not cheap. Others that I have visited with in recent weeks have delighted in the NBA playoffs, talking enthusiastically about who is playing well and who they predict will win each series.

The human soul yearns for delight. We hunt for it. We sacrifice time and money for it because our souls long for more than work and tedium, duty and obligation. God hardwired us for delight.

Delight is defined simply as the experience of great pleasure, joy, or satisfaction.

God’s delight

God himself takes delight. When he creates all things in Genesis 1, his delight is evident as he creates every material and living thing with dazzling variety and then at the end of the day pronounces them good. Proverbs 8 personifies God’s wisdom in creation and says, “I [wisdom] was beside him, like a master workman, and I was daily his delight, rejoicing before him always, rejoicing in his inhabited world and delighting in the children of man” (Proverbs 8:30–31, ESV). I believe these verses also describe Jesus in his role in creation, for through him all things were created.

So God is not an austere, stoic, grim figure. He is a joyful being who delights in the love between the members of the Trinity, delights in his works in creation, and delights in his children.

God the Father delights in the Son

In particular, God the Father delights in his unique Son.

When John the Baptist baptized Jesus, “behold, a voice from heaven said, ‘This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased’” (Matthew 3:17).

Isaiah prophesied these words about the Father’s feelings toward his special servant, who turns out to be his Son: “Behold my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen, in whom my soul delights; I have put my Spirit upon him; he will bring forth justice to the nations” (Isaiah 42:1). The Father’s soul delights in Jesus.

At the transfiguration of Jesus, “behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them, and a voice from the cloud said, ‘This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased; listen to him’” (Matthew 17:5 ESV).

God delights in us as he delights in Jesus

It’s easy to see why God the Father delights in his wonderful Son. Jesus is perfect, glorious, and righteous in every way. What’s hard to comprehend is that the Father also delights in us, marred by sin, broken, failing him time and again. Nevertheless Jesus said in one prayer to the Father, “You sent me and loved them even as you loved me” (John 17:23).

In this verse, note the words “even as.” Jesus said the Father loved the followers of Jesus even as he loved Jesus. How can that be? How could the Father love fallen humans even as he loves Jesus? Only through Jesus. The followers of Jesus are in Jesus, and therefore we are justified and sanctified in Jesus, and therefore the Father can delight in us even as he delights in Jesus.

Here is how God feels about his gathered people in Zion: “He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing” (Zephaniah 3:17, NIV).

Not only does God delight in his people, he has far greater capacities of delight than we do. His delight in Jesus is infinitely greater than a child’s delights at Disney World. His joy, satisfaction, and pleasure in his unique Son is boundless, greater than our vast universe. And as impossible as it is to imagine, his delight is equally boundless in you. You are the son or daughter in whom your heavenly Father delights.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: We may regard God only as an austere, demanding ruler and judge, and life only as duty and work.

God’s way: At the center of creation is a joyful Father who delights in his children. God delights in you as a good father delights in his sons and daughters.

Life principle: Walking with God is not only about obedience and responsibility, but also about delight, mutual delight. When you delight in your Father’s delight in you, your walk with him is transformed from mere obligation to pleasure.

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Your Heavenly Father Cares about Every Aspect of Your Life

We may misinterpret unwelcome situations as God’s indifference, or his silence as apathy.

Imagine growing up with an indifferent father who really didn’t care what happened to you (that may have been the case with you, and if so, this post will be good news indeed). Imagine that he was a “holic”: a workaholic or alcoholic or golfaholic or whateveraholic. What mattered to him was money or fun or ambition or friends, but his kids were an unwelcome responsibility, a burden, a distraction. When you wanted to talk, he didn’t have time. When you needed help, he wasn’t there. When you wanted to play with him, he was too tired.

Your Father in heaven isn’t like that! He cares about you. Everything about you matters to him. He is not forced into dividing his attention between you and his work. He cares about you in the way you always wished your earthly father could and would.

In non-agrarian societies, even the most caring fathers must navigate a continual tension between doing what they must to make a living for their family and actually spending time engaged with their family. But your heavenly Father has no such limitation.

Because your heavenly Father cares, he is sympathetic and compassionate. Because you infinitely matter to him, he has all the time you will ever need with him. When you talk to him, he looks you in the eyes and listens to every word you say. He is never too busy for you, never distracted. When you need help, he gives it.

Your Father cares more than any human could

All that good news is found in 1 Peter 5:7: “Cast all your anxieties on him, for he cares about you” (RSV).

David understood how much he mattered to God, and what he writes in Psalm 139 about the God who cares is as true for you as it was for him:

“O LORD, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it. Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, ‘Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,’ even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you. For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I would count them, they are more than the sand. I awake, and I am still with you.” (Psalm 139:1–18 ESV)

Active concern

The truth of this Psalm can revolutionize your relationship with your heavenly Father. He cares about you like this, at all times, in things large and small, in every way. He is focused on you and thinking about you with love.

This is true even when your prayers go unanswered. Even when you are sick, even when you are afraid and worried, even when circumstances turn for the worst, even when you taste bitter disappointment. He cares about you.

Because your heavenly Father cares, he is not passive. When the time is right, he expresses his deep concern. David imagined God’s active concern like this in Psalm 18:

“In my distress I called upon the LORD; to my God I cried for help. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry to him reached his ears. Then the earth reeled and rocked; the foundations also of the mountains trembled and quaked, because he was angry. Smoke went up from his nostrils, and devouring fire from his mouth; glowing coals flamed forth from him. He bowed the heavens and came down; thick darkness was under his feet. He rode on a cherub and flew; he came swiftly on the wings of the wind. He made darkness his covering, his canopy around him, thick clouds dark with water. Out of the brightness before him hailstones and coals of fire broke through his clouds. The LORD also thundered in the heavens, and the Most High uttered his voice, hailstones and coals of fire. And he sent out his arrows and scattered them; he flashed forth lightnings and routed them. Then the channels of the sea were seen, and the foundations of the world were laid bare at your rebuke, O LORD, at the blast of the breath of your nostrils. He sent from on high, he took me; he drew me out of many waters. He rescued me from my strong enemy and from those who hated me, for they were too mighty for me.” (Psalm 18:6–17 ESV)

This is the picture of a Father who cares! He is not passive about you! David wrote this even though he went through a period of years when he lived as a fugitive running for his life from King Saul. He knew what it was like not to have his prayers answered right away, not to have life going the way he wanted. Nevertheless he knew that through it all God cared about him.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: We may misinterpret unwelcome situations as God’s indifference, or his silence as apathy.

God’s way: Everything that matters to you matters to your heavenly Father, and much, much more.

Life principle: Knowing that God cares enables you to trust and draw near to him in times of need and pain.

Jeremiah 9:23–24: “Thus says the LORD: ‘Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the LORD.’” (ESV)

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Your Father Enjoys Answering Your Prayers

Answered prayer is central to how your heavenly Father wants you to experience his love.

answering prayer

How does God feel about our petitions?

My oldest sons were boys when the first Star Wars movies came out, and when birthdays and Christmas came, I remember their asking for the Star Wars figurines and spaceships that came out as toys. I took the boys to stores and looked at catalogs to see which characters and ships they wanted most. “Can I have this one, Dad?” I thought this stuff was cool, lots cooler than the toys available when I was a kid. I enjoyed buying it, and I really enjoyed giving it and seeing how much fun the boys had playing with it. Giving gifts to your kids can be a strong bonding experience and a great memory.

Asking and giving can be about love, about relationship. That’s the way prayer is with our Father in heaven. Jesus revealed that prayer is much more than a needy person coming to a powerful person for favors. God views prayer as a relationship between a good father and his children. Jesus said:

“Which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” (Matthew 7:9–11, ESV)

Bonding with God through answered prayers

We all want things, not just “toys” but important things we need or want. It could be a job or a needed pay increase, a healing or wisdom to solve a problem, a spouse or a child. Unfortunately the more we want them, the likelier it is our prayers to God will become merely utilitarian—how can we get God to give us what we ask? Our petitions can become more about the request than about our relationship with the Father who loves us. This is a problem because that’s not how the Father primarily views prayer. For him, prayer is about love and bonding, relationship and time together.

God has designed our relationship around prayer. It is central to how he relates to us. I’ve known people who had a religious background that taught we should never pray for ourselves, but only for others. They learned it was selfish to ask God for anything for yourself. Well, they certainly didn’t learn that from reading the Gospels. No one urges people to pray for themselves more than Jesus.

Why would he do this? Because the Father does not resent our requests or wish we would go away. Rather, the Father loves it when we come to him with our wants and needs. He enjoys our requests. He compares our prayers to incense (Rev. 5:8). He invites us to ask and keep asking until we receive. He enjoys seeing how happy we are when we receive his answers. He enjoys, really enjoys, really really enjoys hearing us say thank you. He enjoys seeing us enjoy what he gives.

Why? Because he is good, generous, and kind.

Prayer is about relationship and love, and that’s why God enjoys it, because he is love. He is a relational being, a giver, a let’s-be-together person.

Moreover, our Father loves our faith. He enjoys it when we have enough faith in him to ask for what we want. This kind of faith brings him glory. God delights in our petitions because he delights in our faith, and that is also one reason why our petitions might take a while to be answered.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: We may not want to take time for prayer. We may want to hurry the process and get the answer as quickly as possible. We may not think God wants us to make personal requests.

God’s way: Prayer is a central and foundation aspect of our love relationship with our heavenly Father. Hearing and answering prayer is one of our heavenly Father’s greatest pleasures. It’s the central activity he shares with us, just as loving human fathers have certain things they love doing with their kids, such as eating popcorn together or going for a bike ride together.

Life principle: If you are not practicing daily prayer that includes asking your Father in heaven for the things you desire most, with an attitude of childlike trust that he will give what is best when it is best, you are missing one of the most important ways of bonding with your Father and experiencing his love.

Jeremiah 9:23–24: “Thus says the LORD: ‘Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the LORD.’” (ESV)

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The Connection between the Father’s Love and the Children’s Daily Bread

Why does God provide for your every need?

daily bread

Imagine a family of four: a man and his wife and son, age 5, and daughter, age 7. The man has a well-paying job, and his wife stays home to give full-time childcare. The man is an affectionate father who hugs his children and tells them how much he loves them every morning when he leaves the house and every evening when he returns. All is well for this family until the man decides he wants more money to spend on travel, golf, and expensive dining at a private club.

He decides that the way to get the money he wants is to gamble. He begins going regularly to casinos, gambling more and more, winning now and then, but losing far more than he gains. Soon he spends his savings and begins going into debt to try to make up his losses with a big win.

He still has a family. Every morning when he leaves the house and every evening when he returns, he hugs and kisses his children and tells them how much he loves them. But one day he tells his wife that they can no longer afford to buy clothes and toys for the children. A few weeks later he tells her to get a part-time job to pay for groceries because he can no longer afford to provide food for the family. He tells her that the kids are old enough to take care of themselves for a few hours a day while she is at work.

Every morning when he leaves the house and every evening when he returns, he hugs and kisses the kids and tells them how much he loves them.

No, we would say, he doesn’t love his children. No father who truly loved his children would fail to provide for them like this. Loving fathers provide the fundamental needs of their dependents.

Jesus, on daily bread

Jesus based his teaching about money and the meeting of our daily needs on this principle. God is our Father, we are his dependents. Loving fathers, good fathers, provide for the fundamental needs of their children. For this reason, Jesus taught that we don’t have to worry about the provision of our daily necessities.

In his main teaching on this subject, notice in verses 26 and 32 below that Jesus bases his assurances about the full provision of our needs on the caring Fatherhood of God:

“24 No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money. 25 Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34 Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (Matthew 6:24–34, ESV)

Ultimate responsibility for daily bread

Neglect and love are incompatible.

Your Father in heaven loves you, and you can be sure he is a good Father who takes his responsibility seriously. He has no limitations. He is fully able to provide for you. Therefore he does not expect you to live as if the ultimate responsibility for meeting your needs rested on your shoulders, as if there were no God ruling the world. No, Jesus taught that your heavenly Father is fully aware of your needs and that you are valuable to him as his child. He takes ultimate responsibility for meeting your needs.

Of course, as a good Father he is raising mature children who learn to work hard and be responsible—but we are never to think we have ultimate responsibility for provision. We are not God. Only he rules the affairs of this world. So our responsibility is to work and to manage our money well.

But, Jesus taught, in verse 33, we are not to fear like those who don’t know God, not to live for money like those who don’t know God, not to live unrighteously like those who don’t know God, and not to make the kingdom of God anything lower than first priority like those who don’t know God. If we will “seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness…all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33). Why? Because God is your father, he is good, and he loves you. Those who walk in his ways enjoy his full provision.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: Fallen people live as though God is not their provider, as though money, job, career, job skills, a corporation, the economy, or a boss were their ultimate provider. These are the secondary sources of our provision, but the ultimate source is God the Father.

God’s way: As a loving, caring Father, the Lord gives infinite attention to faithfully providing everything we truly need. God uses secondary sources to provide, but secondary sources only work because he makes them work. (See James 1:17; Psalm 104:10-32; Romans 11:36)

Life principle: The key to enjoying your Father’s faithful provision for every real need is to live by the rules of his house: to seek first his kingdom, that is, his rule in every aspect of your life, and to seek first his righteousness, that is, his commands for how to live in the way that pleases him. Surrender control of your life to God, and obey his commandments, and you will never lack for your true essentials.

“Thus says the Lord…Let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me” Jeremiah 9:23-24
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The Intimacy of Absolute Trust

Our heavenly Father wants to hold us to his bosom.

absolute trust

Over the next seven weeks I plan to continue exploring the theme of God’s love by focusing more closely on how God’s love is revealed in his fatherhood. Here are subjects we will explore in the loving fatherhood of God:

  • The Intimacy of Absolute Trust: He wants to hold us to his bosom.
  • Daily Bread: He wants to provide for us.
  • Answering Requests: He wants to give what we ask.
  • Compassionate Help: He wants to sympathize and help us.
  • Wise and Loving Discipline: He wants to train us to be mature and righteous.
  • Security: He wants to protect us.
  • Inheritance: He wants to give us all he owns.
  • Identity: He wants us to be like him.

Today let’s take the first on the list.

The Intimacy of Absolute Trust

Because God loves us, he wants our relationship with him to have the intimacy that comes from absolute trust. Intimate trust is what good fathers have with good children.

God calls on us to trust him absolutely, without reservation, as a young child trusts a good father. Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3, ESV).

The example of God the Father and God the Son

Jesus displays what the intimacy of absolute trust looks like. Scripture says, “No one has seen God at any time; the only begotten God who is in the bosom of the Father, He has explained [Him.]” (John 1:18, NASB).

To be “in the bosom” of another person means to have your head on their chest, or to be in their embrace. The bosom is the front of the body between the arms. I have seen my son Brian carry his infant son Erlend in a harness that holds Erlend facing him chest to chest. Erlend falls peacefully asleep there in the bosom of his father, the top of his head just below Brian’s chin.

The bosom of the father is not just for infants. In one parable, Jesus told how one wealthy man now in Hades “saw Abraham far away and Lazarus in his bosom” (Luke 16:22–23, NASB). Lazarus was the poor man who during his life had lived in abject poverty, who had lain at the gate of the wealthy man with dogs licking his sores. But now Lazarus was in paradise, comforted by father Abraham himself, in the bosom, in the embrace, of the great patriarch.

In another example, we find that reclining in front of someone at the meal table could be described as being in the person’s bosom. In the culture of Jesus’ time, people ate special meals lying on their sides on mats, leaning on their elbow, with their heads at the table and bodies perpendicular to the table. The mats could be close enough that a person could lean back and lay their head on their neighbor’s chest. So it happened at the Last Supper. After Jesus revealed that someone would betray him, Scripture says, “There was reclining on Jesus’ bosom one of His disciples, whom Jesus loved. So Simon Peter gestured to him, and said to him, ‘Tell [us] who it is of whom He is speaking.’ He, leaning back thus on Jesus’ bosom, said to Him, ‘Lord, who is it?’” (John 13:23–25, NASB).

Here, the beloved disciple John was in the place to hear from Jesus directly in his ear a secret revealed. He was in the bosom of Jesus, able to receive confidential information.

In the Father’s embrace

John 1:18 describes Jesus as being in the bosom of his Father in heaven. This is God’s ideal. He wants each of his children to be in his bosom. In the Parable of the Prodigal Son, when the prodigal finally came to his senses and was walking home from debauchery in a distant land, “his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him” (Luke 15:20). This is how our loving Father in heaven feels about his repentant children. He wants us against his bosom, wrapped in his arms, relying on him as our refuge. There the son or daughter can know they are perfectly safe, for in the bosom of the Father is the only place of true safety. There our souls can rest in absolute, unqualified trust, as peaceful and carefree as an infant asleep on daddy’s chest.

God wants you to trust him without reservation

Our absolute trust and the intimacy that comes with it is so important to God that he has determined to save only those who have faith in him and his words. (Eph. 2:8–9)

He calls us again and again to trust him.

  • “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5, ESV).
  • “Thus says the LORD: ‘Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the LORD. He is like a shrub in the desert, and shall not see any good come. He shall dwell in the parched places of the wilderness, in an uninhabited salt land. Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit’” (Jeremiah 17:5–8, ESV).
  • “Those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you” (Psalm 9:10, ESV).
  • “Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us” (Psalm 62:8, ESV).
  • “O Israel, trust in the LORD! He is their help and their shield. O house of Aaron, trust in the LORD! He is their help and their shield. You who fear the LORD, trust in the LORD! He is their help and their shield” (Psalm 115:9–11, ESV).
  • “O LORD of hosts, blessed is the one who trusts in you!” (Psalm 84:12, ESV)
  • “Those who trust in the LORD are like Mount Zion, which cannot be moved, but abides forever” (Psalm 125:1, ESV).
  • “Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and will not be afraid; for the LORD GOD is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation” (Isaiah 12:2, ESV).
  • “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock” (Isaiah 26:3–4, ESV).
  • “Who among you fears the LORD and obeys the voice of his servant? Let him who walks in darkness and has no light trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God” (Isaiah 50:10, ESV).

Our way and God’s way

Our way: Fallen people lean on their own understanding, or the world’s understanding, or Satan’s false insinuations about God’s character.

God’s way: God is absolutely, perfectly, always, and evermore faithful, truthful, benevolent, and therefore trustworthy.

Life principle: The only safe way to live is to trust in God and his Word without reservation.

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Prior Love

We need to believe in God’s love for us, just as we need to believe in his existence. We need to believe he first loved us.

he first loved us

Suppose there was a young woman, Alicia, looking for romance, who caught the attention of a young man, James, also looking for love. James was handsome, wealthy, kind, and successful. Alicia was invisible to most men, but something about her appealed to him. So, he asked her to go to dinner with him and took her to a pricey restaurant.

They had a pleasant time, but inexplicably by the end of the evening Alicia decided she had no interest in James. He, on the other hand, was infatuated with her.

He was a man who was nothing if not persistent and confident, so he decided to woo her until love blossomed in her tepid heart. He sent her bouquets of flowers and boxes of candy. He asked her to go to movies and dinners, and occasionally she would accept just because she had nothing better to do. He sent her notes praising her beauty and personality, to which she never responded. He wrote her poetry and songs. For a full year he pursued her.

Then, one day the light turned on in Alicia’s heart. She realized what a wonderful man James was, what patience and humility he had shown to her, and how sincere was his affection. Suddenly the intensity of his romantic interest in her was met by her intense interest in him. And the relationship blossomed.

But soon something painful also surfaced in Alicia’s heart. She now loved James so much that she began to fear losing him. She had been cool and indifferent for so long that now she worried James would remember her rejection and hold it against her. If a night passed without a call from James, or if he was anything less than enthusiastic and affectionate when they were together, she would be overcome with fear that his love had waned.

As a result, she began doing everything she could think of to earn and deserve his love. She cooked extraordinary meals for him. She was encouraging, cheerful, and careful never to be in a bad mood around him. But the harder she tried to please, the more she feared losing him.

Who loved first?

This little story illustrates what can happen in our relationship with God. We can doubt his love for us even though he has demonstrated his love in countless ways, and even though his love for us preceded our love for him. We can be tortured by insecurity.

But 1 John 4:19 says, “We love because he first loved us.” God’s love was prior. He loved us first, long before we had any interest in him, long before the world was even created. Ephesians 1:4–5 says, “He chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will.”

If you could not earn God’s prior love when you were rejecting him, then you cannot earn his prior love after you have accepted him. He loved you first; you rejected him. He kept loving you first; eventually you accepted him. He won’t stop loving you.

Faith in God’s love

1 John 4:16–19 says: “16 So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 17 By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. 18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 19 We love because he first loved us.”

God’s prior love is the basis for our love for him. The only reason you love God now and want him now is that he loved you first and continues to love you. You need to believe this. “We have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us” (v. 16). This is an act of faith just as believing that Jesus is the Son of God is an act of faith, just as believing in the resurrection of Jesus is an act of faith. Believing that God loves you is an act of faith. You must choose to reject unbelief about God’s love.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: We may feel we need to earn God’s love. We may feel insecure in his love.

God’s way: He loves us first, before we do anything to deserve his love.

Life principle: We need to believe in God’s love for us, just as we need to believe in his existence. We must not give way to fear and unbelief about God’s prior love.

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Sacrificial Love

What is the greatest sign of God’s love?

sacrificial love

Imagine you are invited to a birthday party for your niece. As the day nears, you begin thinking about what to buy for a present. You love your brother and his daughter dearly, and you want to get as nice a gift as possible. So you think about your budget. You have allocated, let’s say, $1,000 for the year for gifts, including birthdays, Christmas, weddings, anniversaries, and surprises. Accounting for what you have already spent on gifts for the year and the spending you know is still to come, you figure that you should spend $100 on your niece’s gift.

That’s an expensive gift, but on this occasion it just doesn’t feel generous enough. You want to give more, but to do so you will need to cut spending elsewhere. So you look over your budget and see that you have allocated $100 for eating out and entertainment. Hmmm. Taking $50 from that category is relatively painless. So you buy your beloved niece a generous gift costing $150.

Suppose, however, that you didn’t have an easy category in your budget to reduce. Suppose that the only way to get more money for the gift was to reduce your grocery budget for the month, and your grocery budget was already tight. Taking $50 from groceries will require your having no desserts and little meat, as well as buying generic brands instead of the name brands you enjoy. And suppose your heart overflows with love for your brother and niece, and you decide not only to do that but to go further and spend $300 on your niece’s gift, and as a consequence you are willing to eat as little as possible for one month. That is not merely a gift, not merely a generous gift, but a sacrificial gift.

The sacrificial love of Jesus

In his great love, God is a giver, a generous giver, but he is far more than a generous giver. He is a sacrificial giver. In his great love, he gives to the point of great loss and staggering cost.

2 Corinthians 8:9 says, “For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you by his poverty might become rich.”

Before being conceived in the womb of Mary, the Son of God was rich in heaven. He was worshiped by angels and saints, enjoying the love and presence of his glorious Father, in the perfect comfort of one who is a spiritual being living in the spiritual paradise of heaven, executing his Father’s will in heaven and earth. His glory was infinite and perfect.

Yet, at his Father’s loving command, the Son of God chose to become poor. He left that beautiful place to become a man, to take on weak human flesh, and through that body to become susceptible to fatigue, pain, agony, limitation, and worst of all the abuse of evil men. When he gave himself up to the Roman soldiers, to beatings, to scourging, to the cross, to bearing our sins, to the wrath of God, he made the greatest of all sacrifices. He loved us not just generously, but sacrificially.

The sacrificial love of the Father

The sacrificial love of the Son of God is matched only by the sacrificial love of the Father. John 3:16 says, “God so loved the world that he gave his only Son.” If God gave us something material like more possessions, that doesn’t really cost him anything, for he can create more of whatever he gives. But giving his Son to suffer and die for people who reject God, that is costly.

One thing I can hardly bare to see is the parents of a soldier receiving his or her remains in a casket as a casualty of war. That is a parent’s greatest sacrifice for their country. And that was the Father’s sacrifice for you.

God the Father’s love is not merely a giving love, or a generous love, but a sacrificial love.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: We prefer to give out of abundance, to give comfortably, not out of poverty.

God’s way: God loves in a way that is willing to suffer significant loss for the sake of another’s gain.

Life principle: God’s sacrifice for us rightly motivates our sacrifice for him.

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Comforting Love

How does God comfort us?

Lasting comfort

Because God loves you, he comforts you.

Over the last seven Sundays our church had a fasting-and-prayer meeting that followed the morning worship service. We fasted breakfast and lunch, or just lunch, prayed for about two hours, then broke the fast by eating a wonderful meal together. Each Sunday as I ate that food after fasting, I was struck by how wonderful it tasted and what a blessing it is to eat good food. I found myself numerous times saying, “This tastes so good,” and others were saying the same thing.

There was a reason for this. The food at our prayer meetings is always great, but it is especially satisfying after fasting. Fasting brings on the distress of hunger. The hungrier we are, the better food tastes and the more comforting it is not only to the body but to the soul. You probably have heard the phrase “comfort food.” Comfort food is the tasty, filling food you long to eat when your soul is hurting. Comfort is a very good thing.

The Comfort God

The Bible says the Lord is the “God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our afflictions” (2 Corinthians 1:3–4). God’s comfort is a very good thing, a very loving thing. God’s comfort is a good because life in this world is marked by affliction, pain, hardship, and grief. Bad things happen to us and the people we love. Loved ones move away. Family members die. Jobs come and go, as do the difficulties and challenges of our work, and sometimes the excessive hours. The human body suffers disease and weakness. Financial setbacks befall us. Satan and evil wage war with the saints. Life is hard, the world is often punishing, and our soul feels it.

Therefore we need comfort. At the end of a long, toiling day, our body needs to crawl into bed, pull up the covers, and sleep. At the end of a long week, we need a day of Sabbath. When the skin on your hands is dry and chapped, you long to rub in cream. When you shiver in the cold, you long for a blanket or a thick, downy jacket. When you walk a long distance on hot day, you thirst for a tall glass of water. When you endure a long season of troubles, you crave hearing good news. Comfort is good, and we need it, even if it’s just a slowly sipped cup of coffee.

The God of all comfort

Because God loves you, he delights to comfort you. He is the “God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our afflictions” (2 Cor. 1:3–4). God is like Barzillai and his two friends, who came to King David’s aid in his time of need. David’s son Absalom had betrayed him, gathering a following, turning the hearts of Israel against David, and finally gathering an army to kill David and his loyalists. David and his people hurriedly fled Jerusalem and headed into the wilderness with next to nothing. As quickly as they could, they walked for miles through the arid terrain fearing Absalom’s immediate assault.

Faint and downhearted, they needed to camp, and as they did they encountered the God of all comfort, in the faces of three men. “When David came to Mahanaim, Shobi the son of Nahash from Rabbah of the Ammonites, and Machir the son of Ammiel from Lo-debar, and Barzillai the Gileadite from Rogelim, brought beds, basins, and earthen vessels, wheat, barley, flour, parched grain, beans and lentils, honey and curds and sheep and cheese from the herd, for David and the people with him to eat, for they said, ‘The people are hungry and weary and thirsty in the wilderness.’” (2 Samuel 17:27–29)

Shobi, Machir, and Barzillai were wealthy men whose households God had enriched and whose hearts God had moved to help David and his people in their hour of affliction. They were there when David needed them because God in his love had put them there. They were the hands and feet and food and water of the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction.

How to find ultimate comfort

“Comfort, comfort my people, says your God” (Isaiah 40:1 ESV)

“I, I am he who comforts you” (Isaiah 51:12 ESV).

After a season of persecution against the church, “the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria had peace and was being built up. And walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, it multiplied.” (Acts 9:31 ESV)

God comforts us because he loves us as a mother loves her child. “As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you” (Isaiah 66:13 ESV).

How does God comfort us? For starters, he provides the worldly comforts we need.  “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights” (James 1:17, ESV). But our Father goes beyond that to provide the greatest, enduring comfort that any soul can experience: He gives his presence. He imparts the knowledge of God. He speaks his promises. Apart from these, there is no true and lasting comfort, and with his presence, his promises, and his revelation of who he is, our soul finds true peace. Dispelling fear, sadness, and despair, God’s Word and Spirit are the best comfort food.

Our way and God’s way

Our way: Fallen people try to find comfort primarily in created things rather than in the Creator.

God’s way: We find comfort primarily in knowing God and his love, and secondarily in the comforts he mercifully provides.

Life principle: Only when we find soul comfort in God can we be fully comforted by the consolations he provides from this world.